Continuation...

My last post was at one of my lowest point... and throughout the day I started looking online for help in dealing with the issue, trying to understand the situation. What did I find? That it seems a little common for a baby to choose a certain someone that they get especially close to. This is because they are going through their separation anxiety stage... and I seem to find one of the most peak time during which this happens is when they are around 9 months.

There are some suggestions suggested by the experts:
1. Always smile and be happy when you see your baby, even when you're deeply stressed out
2. When you baby is crying and try to reach for another person, don't get angry because they can actually feel the negative vibe and be confuse; instead act excited and let her have her way for now
3. After coming home, have the person taking care of your baby participate in getting your baby excited to see you such as cheering when you walk in the door and always saying your name throughout the day in an excited and happy voice
4. Spend a lot of quality time when you can to bond with your baby

At first, I balked at the suggestions because in my mind if I gave her the chance to walk away from me... then what time do I get with her.... but for want to make it better... I decided to give the suggestions a try...

I walked in from work to find her, as always cuddled up to her nanny... and when I wanted to take her... she turned away... usually I would just take her and whisk her away... but that day, I laughed and showed her a toy I was holding... and in an excited voice started to tease her... "look what mummy has.... siapa punya nie?"... She immediately smiled and thank goodness for small favors, her nanny started participating... "eh... mummy ade ape tue?"

As Jellybean reached out for her maracas, I held out my arms and with only a little hesitancy, she let me pull her into my arms... and I quickly carried her outside to look at the birds and sky... I kept up a steady chatter and kisses throughout the evening and when she wanted to go to her nanny or grandma... i kissed her and let her go... and I slowly noticed the difference in a few hours... she no longer cries or whines when she sees them... she was more relaxed and was able to play and babble on her own... no longer clingy to their clothes...

And by the next day... she was all mine... :)

Of course when the weekday starts and I get to spend less time with her, she starts to resists being with me again... but I am learning... to give her a little space... and a little time... to smile and persuade rather than take... and to sometimes just let her be... even though what I want most was to just have her cuddled right up next to me.

In return? She starts to ask for me now... in fact sometimes she just wants me there to be with her and play with her... and when she sees me after work... she gets excited and immediately comes to have me pick her up...and when she hears me singing her favorite bed time songs... she sits still to listen with her blankie... or immediately stands up to show that she still wants to play...

That's motherhood I guess... I have a lot more to learn and I hope that I can dig up more patience to withstand the bountiful emotional times that's bound to hit once a while...

9 months of pure joy and true love... 9 months of learning... 9 months of trying to be a better me....

;)