Do you have something that you once used to do... like in a way it is a part of you... that now... as an older adult you realise somehow you don't do anymore?
Well... I used to spend my 'me' time in my room... blasting out all sort of music and dance my heart out... hahah and when I say my heart meaning literally move to my own beat skills or no skills (more like no skills :P ) I would sing too... and pretend my voice was ohhh soooo good... hahahah (I don't know why in my head I used to think that a closed door means no one else can listen to me singing... ahhhh a young heart). What kind of songs would I dance to? Hmm... all sorts... classic Disney songs (menari ballet lah kan..hahahah) and then popular upbeat music... and honestly I would have the time of my life... That was my moment... my private moment.
As you grow older... reality sets in deeper... you do things that 'make sense'? I mean jumping around to the beat of Aladdin or jiggle your way pretending to be one of the Pussycat Dolls doesn't quite make sense when you're expected to do some much needed laundry and put your baby to sleep... or God forbid if you forgot to make sure groceries are in for the week before you start work on Monday.
But your baby..... the one whom you would gladly give up anything for has a knack of reminding you a part of your self that you may have ... for a little while forgot... for me... it was the pure joy of just 'dancing'... hehehe how? By me watching her dance... she doesn't move in the conventional way... hips or tapping toes to the beat of the music... no... that's too mundane for my beautiful princess.. she dances with her heart... she jumps and twirls... and have her hands flying about... and I can see the pure joy in her eyes... :)
She dances with passion... and she loves music... and when she starts moving... heheheh well.. you gotta see it... hehehe..
Well what I wanted to write out for today is that throughout time you find that you sometimes tend to lose yourself... you feel life is just a plateau of the same thing and you wonder... how? when? But I guess maybe it's about finding oneself again against time... and doing things that we love or rediscover that thing you love that makes you happy and free you to accept the part of life that tends to bring you down. Does this mean I should start dancing again?? Hahaha... well that is a funny thought... if I do... this time I would have a lovely partner... my sweet Jellybean... :)
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