Connection with my Toddler

Weekends really fly past us... I mean you wait all for 5 days to get there.. and the next thing you know... it's Monday and the weekend is over... tskkkk

Last weekend we had a busy schedule... we went to Jakel for my clothing project and there, my sweetie pie Shiya had one of her meltdowns... I guess the heat... no attention from me and just the huge crowd (sale, what else)...was just too much for her to handle...

I must say I had to bodily carry her to the car... wriggling and screaming... and proceeded to watch her crying and throwing a fit all of near 20 mins... I actually lost my temper and it took quite an effort to reign it all in...

But along the craziness... I remember what Dr. Markham commented in her book "Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids"... how she was just too overwhelmed and her shrieks are actually a way of her reaching out for comfort or help.... so I tried my best to control my feelings and used a calmer and soothing voice... I didn't ask her to stop crying... but instead assured her I understand... and kissed her... the tears tapered out... and she looked at me with a cute pout and kept calling out to me in her manja voice... heheheh it sorta worked I guess... because from there we connected in a way... I knew that she wanted my reassurance that everything is ok... and she wanted me to make whatever that was bothering her go away.. namely her shoe that was missing the cat thingy... chewed gum just to stick it back on... gave her some ribena goodness... and turned on her ipad to show her favourite pororo...

I read a little today on how when you encounter a defiant nature in your child that it is a mark of a relationship problem.... and yes, I have that problem since she turned 2... I can see it in her stance and her eyes whenever we would come to a stand still .. or a battle of wills from lack of better words to appropriately surmise the situation...

It's a shocker of how accurate the book seems to get it... and how off mark I was in regards on how to handle my toddler... punishment is not the way... gentle understanding is supposedly the best remedy... ahhh... some parts of me are so confused really... but I did note on her disconnection with me whenever I would get mad at some situations... I think it's all about balance... and compromise... and like the book said.... connection...

One interesting part is it asks us ... how many times did we connect in the past 2 days... I would say a few times... though not nearly enough...

Another is... name 2 things to connect that we can do today...

And lastly... to look back on the few times that we were distracted and how to improve on that so that we could connect better....

Well who said we needed to stop learning when we are older... there's always something new to learn...

Will try the few things that the book suggests and try to deepen my connection with my Jellybean... Can't wait for 11th May... Did I mention before? That's when my unpaid leave starts... and my loooong overdue 'summer' with my sweetheart...

;)